“Exercise is the only thing that calms me down”
“ If I don’t lose weight, I can’t ever be happy”
One of the toughest parts about recovering from eating concerns is coping with the barrage of eating disorder thoughts that try to thwart recovery. This is why getting better often feels really bad! It can be hard to be strong in the face of the thoughts, and sometimes it is important to throw every single strategy their way…so keeping that in mind, I have put together a list of strategies that can help to reclaim recovery from the grip of eating disorder thoughts:
- It is helpful to try to understand the underlying message beneath thoughts. For example, hopeless thoughts, such as, “it is useless, I am never going to get better” have the power of reducing motivation to recover. One reason hopeless thoughts can be so powerful is because recovery involves making changes that trigger a lot of anxiety! Hopeless thoughts provide an escape from having to deal with the anxiety of change, because they allow you to stop engaging in recovery, and can actually calm the system. Unfortunately, they also prevent you from engaging in recovery….It can be helpful to explore thoughts in this fashion because once they are less mysterious, you have the power to challenge them! Perhaps it is time to start analysing!
- It can be really helpful to journal. One of the helpful things about writing is it activates the rational/logical part of your brain. You may find that at times you are in touch with the part that wants to recover, but perhaps when emotions are running high your mind may not be able to see that…through writing, you will be able to see the thoughts for what they really are and may be able to help you see things from a different perspective.
- Don’t accept the eating disorder thoughts, rather, have a lively dialogue with them until you are persuaded by the healthy part of you. When you notice the eating disorder part of you talking, it can be helpful to ask yourself, what does the healthy part of me think about this? For example, if you notice a thought, ‘if I don’t lose weight I can never be happy’, the healthy part of you may argue, ‘my mind is in control of your happiness, not my body’. It is always helpful to end a dialogue with the healthy part of you. The more that you do this, the stronger the healthy voice will become. The brain is like a muscle and like any other muscle, the more you exercise certain aspects the stronger they become.
- Sometimes the thoughts about weight, shape and eating which are trying to tell you to lose weight or to eat less are so strong that they may be hard to challenge…at these points, it may be helpful to ask yourself the following questions:
“Am I so upset that I really just need to distract myself from the thoughts by doing something which takes up my attention, like listening to loud music or cleaning or going for a walk?”
“Do I need to soothe myself by having a hot bath or lighting a candle?”
“Do I have the strength to acknowledge to myself that even though I cannot challenge the thought, I know that it is just a thought, not a fact, even if it feels like one….and therefore, perhaps I can imagine letting it go, just like leaves in a stream or clouds in the sky.
This is called thought defusion, it is a way of distancing from thoughts so they don’t take up all your energy.
- Another strategy you could try is to pay careful attention to the impact the thoughts are having on your body sensations and your feelings and to start paying attention to the present moment. You may like to ask yourself, what impact does having these thoughts have on my body, and are they helpful to me?
All of the above strategies have been used by people going through recovery. Some strategies may be more helpful than others and at times it may feel like none of them work! It is important to persevere and remember that each time you practice a strategy you strengthen the part of you that wants recovery.
